july, god help us.

the baby residents just hatched.  on the plus side, they are usually friendly and eager to please.  on the other hand, i get tired of hearing "i'm just going to run that by my senior...".  um, i asked you for tylenol.  lets use that shiny new degree, shall we?

thus, i have put together a little list i like to call 'helpful tips for new residents'.  the rules are as follows

1.  let me help you.  i know the floor, the patients, the team WAY better than you do.  i have been here 1825 times longer than you (literally, i did the math).  ask my opinion.  take my advice.  i want you to succeed so our lives can all run smoother.

2.  if you don't know, ask.  seriously.  this will save me a lot of time calling you to clarify your nonsensical/unsafe orders.  if you don't know the doses for things, check with pharmacy.  if you want to know how we usually do things, ask one of the nurses.  if you are worried about a patient call your senior.  if you don't, i will ask you to, or i'll do it myself.

3.  answer your pager.  SERIOUSLY.  if you are in the OR, have the nurse call me back.  if you're in the ED, you are one of 234098 people in the trauma and can take 2 seconds to let me know you're busy.  i will wait for stool softeners and FYIs patiently, if i have someone screaming in pain or crashing i will stalker page you and all of your superiors.  don't mess.

4.  let me know if you are overwhelmed.  if you are so far behind that you're about to cry, i will stall a family or save my discussion on lab values for another time.  you need to eat.  you need to take a moment to pull yourself together.  maybe you need to ask your peers for help, or ask me if there's something i can do for you.  talk to me.  at the very least, i can get my coworkers to back off of you for a little bit so you can catch up.

5.  there is no reason ever to be snotty or snippy or rude to me.  NONE.  use your words.  if you are frustrated with something i did, tell me.  you'll get an explanation or an apology.  if you're stressed, see above.  i can remember every resident who has crossed me by name, and i will not trust you for the next 5 years if you are evil.

6.  doctors and nurses can be (gasp!) friends.  i'm not asking you to go shopping, but we can have fun at work.  when i like you and we have a good working relationship with mutual trust, things will be easier for the both of us.  trust me.

7.  keep me posted.  if you're doing something with one of my patients, i want to know about it, especially if they need to be medicated.  do not pull my tubes/lines/drains without telling me.  when they disappear, it freaks me out.  a heads up is all i need.

8.  you don't have to mop the floors, but you'd better keep my rooms clean.  i do not expect to walk into a room covered with casting plaster and a freshly-pulled chest tube sitting out with the end in the garbage.  i am not your maid.    

those are the basics.  guess we'll see how this batch does.