bffs

i don't want to get all emo up in here, but i swear most days nobody gets me.  people think that nursing is 
a. easy
b. a good way to make a lot of money (haha)
or 
c. like working in a doctor's office.  

thank god for my fabulous, amazing, very talented nurse (and real life) bff.  she and i have been through everything together...the first horrid, cry-all-day-everyday years of being a nurse...the first awful PTSD-inducing codes...the first time a doctor gave a stupid order...all of it.  she makes me laugh until i cry, and i recently dug up some fabulous emails that detail our trials.  please excuse me while i go pee my pants.  


dearest friend,

lawdhelpmejesusimabouttolosemyshit. i do not care that you do not have
$24 to pay your copay, but you have enough money to pay for your
cocaine. i hate my patient today, and when they turn {the hospital} into some
holistic + integrative medicine hotel, it's going to be worse. okay.
well, time to go slap some bitches

to which i reply:


my advice on the person who wants you to give him $24?  give it to him, it will make him go away.  this is sad.  tgisunday, and drink up.

she also understands my frustrations on the day to day hassles of nursing.  and she's way more descriptive than i am :)

begin rant.

i hate my job. i hate my job. i hate my job. i hate my job. i hate my
job. i hate my job. i hate my job. I HATE MY JOB. I HATE MY JOB. I
HATE MY JOB!!!!!!!! seriously,  i do.

i hate {new computer system}.
i hate my patients. especially my icu tx. A*HOLE.
totalm*f*a*hole. just told me that i want him to stay sick
because i'm afraid i'm going to lose my job. this is said between
labored respirations at 32/minute, because i said he can't shower.
seriously.
i hate doctors, too. they're lazy.
i hate how pharmacy can't send meds up under {new computer system}.
i hate how the kitchen doesn't send trays.
i hate how blood sugars and vitals dont get charted.
i hate how i get attitude when i ask for things.
i hate when all my meds are missing, so everything is late. and i have
to do twice the work to find them, and then find time to go give them
again.
i hate how icu lied about supplementing potassium before transferring.
i hate how there are now no orders for potassium, and i have to call
the dr. for the billionth time to try and find some.
i hate how i started with 5 patients, sent someone home, and had to
pick up someone else by 1545 so we could send a nurse home because we
were overstaffed.
i hate this s*.
seriously.
i am going to drink all weekend.
and i wish i could start now.
but that's illegal, and i'd lose my job. but right now, that would be
a blessing.


oh, look what time it is. it's f*thiss* o'clock.

i'm going to go eat now. and turn my phone off. if anybody is looking
for me, they can go to hell.end rant.

truth.  every word.  

she also is one of the only people i know who has patients who are equally as/more repulsive than my own.  as is evidenced by:

this evening i had the pleasure of admitting a darling 40 year old woman for weakness, dizziness and syncope from the er. she's schizo, htn, dm2, ckd, asthma, seizures (and not the 'seize the day' kind), smoker, cva with left residual, in contact for hx mrsa and r/o cdiff. oh, and she's just plain weird. lives at a rooming house, her "fiance" is homeless (and thankfully left to head to {the shelter} for dinner, but came back with bloodshot eyes..hmmm....wonder where he detoured for a little something special). when i walked in and introduced myself, and asked her how she was, of course her reply was "i'm hungry. and i'm not going to eat a diabetic diet. i need to eat sour cream." ummm....okay, good to see you, too, ma'am. and sour cream? wtf.  so, she had a seizure at 0400 and has been having diarrhea x a month. yep, a month of daily diarrhea without the need to go to the doctor. she's orthostatic with lying bps 90/50, sitting 70/40...a bit dehydrated. anyways, you get the idea. she's nuts. and she's kinda sick. but mostly just nuts.  so, when i'm doing her admission database, i have to ask her about her meds (in addition to safety, which she says she doesn't feel safe because whenever she goes to the bathroom at her rooming house - so she goes with the door open - her roommates dry to steal her vicodins...anyways). so, when i ask her about her meds, she tells me she doesn't take them. when i ask her why, she says "well. i'm too lazy to walk to walgreens to pick them up." seriously? so, because you can't walk your crazy ass to walgreens to pick.up.your.seizure.meds. i have to admit and pay for your hospital stay? when i offered that she take the bus, she informed me that she "ain't gonna waste $2.25 on a bus ticket". but she can waste her money on a pack of cigs a day? f*. that s* pisses me off.

so, then i have to give her some diflucan. guess why? oh, yah. she's itchy. down in lady town. i just wanted to give her the pills and get out of her room, but she felt the need to tell me...and i quote..."well, yesterday i was itchy down there, so i put my finger in it, and when i took it out it had curds of whey on it". take a moment to barf, please. THESE PEOPLE ARE INSANE. and she says this all with a blank stare. how am i not supposed to 1. barf, 2. laugh or 3. cry with these people.

see?  

so in summary, god bless fabulous, amazing, very talented nurse (and real life) bff.  and may she never have to hear the phrase "curds of whey" ever again.  amen.